It's been a long time coming, but I knew it would come to an end some day. Today was the day, and deep down, I'm very sad about it. My twin 14-year old sons have officially become teenagers. What makes it official, you might ask? Today was the first time neither of them gave me a hug before leaving for the school bus. Call me sentimental, but I'm going to miss those hugs. I guess it's just one of those unspoken rights of passage.
I didn't realize the same thing had happened between my father and I until the hospital orderly was getting ready to wheel him into the operating room nearly twenty years ago. I remember feeling so awkward. I didn't know what to say or do, so I gave him a big hug and told him that I loved him. He looked at me and smiled and said that he loved me too. I couldn't remember the last time I spoke those words to him before that day, but I'll never forget that smile on his face. I made a point of telling him that I loved him and hugged him every chance I got after that day. He died six months later.
I don't remember the last time my 20-year old son and I shared such affection. I know that we used to when he was younger, but at this particular point in our lives, it would be awkward for us both. If life has taught me anything though, it's that things will change. I am confident that there will come a time when my sons will again feel comfortable giving me a hug and telling me that they love me and I will respond in kind from the bottom of my heart.
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I read this in Whole Wheat Radio's (Jim's) shared stuff, and found it very moving. You can't tell who the source was when you read stuff in Google reader this way... so I was curious and clicked and found out it was Kimchifox, whom I didn't even know kept a blog. This is a sweet little piece, Kimchifox - thanks for sharing it... Esther
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